The Great Indian School Hunt: Because Who Needs Sleep (Or More School Bags)?

Aruneeta Srivastava
Apr 3
2 min read

Ah, the sacred Indian parenting ritual—The School Admission Process. It’s like Squid Game, but with more paperwork, emotional manipulation, and free swag. Because nothing says "Pick us!" like a branded water bottle and a tote bag your kid will use exactly once.

"Back in My Day…" vs. "Now Look at Them!"

When I was a kid, school was simple:

Discipline? A wooden ruler.
Playtime? Running from said ruler.
Marketing? A handwritten "Admissions Open" sign outside the gate.

Now? Schools woo toddlers like they’re VIP shoppers at a luxury store. Little Kiku came home with:

A backpack (from a school she’ll never attend).
A water bottle (that leaks, because symbolism).
A "fun" activity book (that’s just stealthy homework in disguise).

At this rate, I expect a loyalty card—"Enroll with us and get your 10th school-branded pencil case free!"

The School Safari: A Parent’s Survival Guide

After visiting approximately "n" schools (and accumulating enough freebies to open a stationery shop), I finally found The One. Not because of the swag (though the teddy bear cake helped), but because:

They Bribed… I Mean, Welcomed Kiku with a Giant Walking Teddy – Sure, she screamed and hid behind me, but hey, emotional bonding through trauma. Also, bonus points for the teddy-shaped cake because nothing wins over a toddler like sugar.
Splash Day > Spelling Test – Instead of forcing kids to recite multiplication tables, they let them play with water. My 90s kid brain is still processing this luxury.
Meal Time = Life Skills – They don’t just feed kids; they teach them to eat without recreating a food tornado. A skill I, as an adult, am still mastering.
No Rulers, Just Ball Pits – The closest thing to punishment here is missing Ball Zone time. The horror.

The Real Curriculum: Love (And Strategic Freebies)

The school I chose doesn’t just teach ABCs—it teaches kids that learning can be fun. Revolutionary, I know. (It is not a paid ad :P )

Montessori? Sure.
Reggio Emilia-inspired play? Why not.
Experiential learning? Basically, they let kids touch things instead of just staring at a blackboard. Groundbreaking.

Final Thoughts: Is It Perfect? No. Is It Better Than What We Had? Absolutely.

Yes, schools are more expensive now. Yes, the pressure is still there. But at least some are trying to make childhood less about fear and more about curiosity (and free water bottles).

So to all the parents still on the Great School Hunt, here’s my advice:

Don’t fall for the swag. (But also, take the free bag. You’ll need it.)
Look for the teachers who care. (Not just the ones who hand out the best goodie bags.)
And if the school has a giant teddy bear, maybe warn your kid first.

Because at the end of the day, the best school isn’t the one with the fanciest freebies—it’s the one where your kid runs in smiling and comes home still curious (and maybe clutching yet another branded notebook).

Now, if only they had a "Parent Settling Period" with coffee and therapy… sigh. One can dream. ☕